“Am I done yet?” is a question any sailor might ask about her boat on any given day. Kagán has undergone hundreds of projects, large and small, during our decades together. From my first summer as first mate when we hardly left the dock while reconfiguring her windlass (for the non-nautical, that is the equipment used to deploy and retrieve the anchor) to replacing her standing rigging to installing new electronics to redesigning her staysail rigging to having new sails made—and that’s just naming a few of the bigger undertakings. And then there’s the ‘around again’ projects that need to be started over as soon as I’ve finished, like scrubbing and polishing. It’s not simply scrubbing; it all fits into what I believe about life on Kagán—if I take care of her, she’ll take care of me. And maybe that’s not just about boats. . . .
But back to projects, the biggest and longest project I’ve taken on is re-powering Kagán (well, really, our exceptional marine diesel mechanic took it on, but you get the idea). Re-powering means that Kagán’s auxiliary engine has been replaced, and believe me, this is big—both in the engineering and the implementation. This project has just been completed, I think. I say “I think” because I thought it was done two months ago, and it wasn’t quite, since one of the brand new pumps on the brand new engine had a bad seal and needed to be replaced.
All of this asking—am I done yet?—has made me consider (after only 20 summers aboard), whether boat projects are ever quite complete. And it has also made me realize that boats (or houses or gardens or careers or relationships, or people) have projects, or are projects, that will never be done. Because it’s more than just scrubbing. It’s more than making things shine (though making things look beautiful can, indeed, be satisfying). It’s about making things work, and how things work can change with time, innovation, and discovery. The realities of ‘living the dream’ are sometimes not so dreamy—it’s not all cocktails (or shrimp cocktails) in the cockpit or sailing into the sunset—but maybe that makes the reality even more rewarding.
So, I’m learning to embrace that my beloved boat will never be “done,” and neither will I—whether I’m polishing her stainless steel to both look brilliant and be protected from the elements (my current ‘around again’ project) or exploring what makes me tick at any given time. And rather than striving to be “done,” I’m working on loving (or at least not grumbling about) the day-to-day process of boat, and life, projects.
Ah, the great satisfactions of boat ownership, wherein the boat actually owns you. But the resulting joys are worth the effort. And your excellent boat deserves that kind of care.
But I’m curious about the redesign of your staysail system. Does it now point higher to windward?
I love day to day processes! Have a fun summer on the water!
Deb, it’s wonderful to hear about your journeys, both inner and outward bound. Kagan will, I’m sure, take care of you and give you hours of beautiful, joyful sailing.
I’m wayyyy late on this, but congratulations on getting your book out there. It was wonderful to read it, and Kudos to your writers talent! I think you did a tour, and I hope it went well! Sending well wishes your way, Bobbie Brown
Other than the shrimp cocktail (a no-no for a kosher keeper like myself), it all sounds wonderful – the work and the rewards. Keep polishing, scrubbing, tinkering and, most of all, enjoying!
Ah, yes, the practice of non-striving. What a great reminder to just be in the moment and content with all that is right now. Thank you!
Nice picture of two beautiful ladies. Fair winds my friends.
You work very hard on Kagán and it shows. It’s a privilege to sail her. So beautiful and seaworthy, like her Skipper.